2014 Review

v1.0.9

Torch Always has my back
Willing to admit his flaws
My favorite roommate.
Eulogy for 2014 Here rests a measure of time whose units have all been spent. It has reached the inevitable end to its long and full life.
Throughout its four seasons, 2014 bore witness to a countless number of beginnings and ends. Now, as it always is, the last death of the year is to the year itself. Farewell 2014. You will not be forgotten.

I will not mourn for you, 2014. To do so would be an insult to the life you lead. You were as much a puzzle onto me as I know I was onto you. I was a leaf, and you were my canyon. The wind blew me through your treacherous ravines. I did not ask to be taken there, but asking is not a luxury afforded to a leaf. With time I found that there was somewhat of a beauty is in your depths. You pushed me. You pushed me hard. It was more than I thought I could take, yet here I remain.

I am a better person for having met you. You taught me new levels of desperation, but also of the reach of my own abilities. Your icy love has brought greater strength and clarity to my resolve. My mind will hold strong to every lesson you've taught me. My heart will forever bare your scars.

Report Card

2014 grade: C-
In 2014 I learned a tremendous amount about myself. I now have a clear path for the grand dreams I plan to accomplish. This year I've also become better at communication, and I am more confident than ever. I am also more intelligent than ever. Despite all of those strides, and despite committing myself to my work intensely every day of the year I still failed to earn even a minimum wage. Money is not success, but its absence prevents me from reaching other goals. Internally this was a milestone year full of very positive things, but finishing my projects are earning a standard income were part of goal, and my magnitude of failure towards those goals makes this one of the worse years in my personal history.

My unfair, biased, hand-picked favorites of 2014

Favorite Person: Carl Sagan I enjoy Neil Degrasse Tyson. I respect his work as an astrophysicist, and I commend him for his valuable social contributions to science. Even with all that, The Carl stands in a league of his own. Carl's articulation, brilliance and his turtleneck have fought for science and brought awareness to an entire generation. Knowledge is humanity's only confirmed savior, and Carl Sagan is my personal space Jesus.
Favorite Place: The Busy House The Busy House belongs to Gui and Evan. It was our headquarters, and the spare room was my makeshift office. The house itself was nothing special. In fact it was a bit rundown, but while I was in their company it was more appealing than any other place on earth.
Favorite Thing: My Folding Chair My super duper zen gravity chair. It folds up, it reclines, and provides full ergonomic body support. It also has a cup holder and arm rests. If it had a urine hole I wouldn't have to get up all day.

What I did right in 2014

I stuck with my projects I fought forward, even as things threatened to crumble. I refused to give up on what I started. It's no longer okay for me to treat my time as a disposable commodity. I've chosen my projects wisely and I am willing to do whatever it takes to see them into fruition.
I remained rational I thought through my problems, even with turbulent emotional situations around me. I became more vocal in my opposition to irrationality.
I became more familiar with the word No I gained confidence in saying No. I turned down jobs that didn't play well with my startup commitments. I said no to stakeholders who brought up dumb ideas. These things stem from an increase in my self confidence. I have more trust in my own judgment than I have in the past. I now consider myself to have sufficient experience to actually speak up. I've seen enough to be able to identify and avert certain types of train wrecks. It's a very positive thing. I aim to increase the scope of my No's and my verbal opinions. I'm exiting my silent period. We'll see what comes next.
I didn't starve to deathI made no money, but I learned to eat well even on an extremely small budget. Thanks to careful planning and Publix Bo-Go deals I learned how to survive on almost nothing.
The beginning of my long term plans Startups and technology are not my end game. I will not and cannot be at this forever. I have other things, other callings to attend to. At 30 I'm now officially behind schedule. By now I expected to already be generating the money to fund my other callings. I'm discouraged, but I am not relenting. To increase my chances of reaching my goals I have now formally mapped out my future plans and segmented my life into phases: Phase One (Current), Bridge One, Phase Two, Bridge Two and Fade.
Phase One ends with the successful sale of my startups. I haven't proven to myself that I have what it takes to complete Phase One. Until I can demonstrate an ability to finish this current phase I wont openly describe the subsequent ones for fear of generating too much fruitless hype and concern of diverting too much of my energy. My goals are vivid, and my longing for it is strong, but for now that side of me will exist exclusively in my journals and in my dreams.

What I did wrong in 2014

I failed my partners I couldn't launch BTP in the timeline I promised. I failed to create realistic estimates for the development of the project. My judgment was suppose to help turn their guesses into something more realistic. I was suppose to anticipate obstacles that we would face and remove them. I was suppose to keep everyone focused on the end goal, producing the best possible result without getting lost in the details. We are going to get through it. We've gone this far. I will make this a success. I wont stop until I do, and in the meantime I readily acknowledge my failure.
I also failed my LESS partners. I was unable to transition us into a successful launch. I kept the team together, I'm happy about that. But I wasn't a good enough entrepreneur to capitalize on the opportunity in front of me. LESS is still stuck and I can still do better. I need to be a better coder, I need to be a better communicator, I need to be a better designer. I don't know what I'm missing, but whatever the problem is I will fix it.
I broke or abandoned all my romantic relationships My standards are high. I am blunt and thoroughly logical. I have a low tolerance for bullshit. I am intensely focused on my work. Those things make me relatively incompatible with most of the women I encounter. My goals are bigger than I am, and I rather give up short term happiness of a theoretical relationship than allow it slow my progress towards my chosen purpose. I don't regret dropping any of the relationships that I've cut. If I finish Phase One soon then I will make time for a relationship. In the meantime the loneliness does hurt, but not as much as the idea of being a failure.
Financial impotency For the fourth year in a row I've failed to make any serious type of money. Extreme corner cutting has kept me treading water. But as a result of my lack of income my debt has remained high and I have diminished the very little I have to my name. I cannot survive another year of this.

The Good, The Bad and the Ugly

The Good Hearing the mayor and the Tallahassee City Commission praise LESS.
The Bad Watching my leg muscles atrophy from lack of use. I ran only four times this year.
The Ugly Cringing as I see a new email from Patrick.

The source of my strength is the bond I share with my friends and family. They are the ones I look to for inspiration. They are the band-aids on life's scrapes. They are my warmth in a cold universe.

I hold myself responsible for lifting mountains, but I'll allow no confusion on the matter: the sacrifices and generosity of my friends and family are what made me who I am. It is to them that I give my thanks and gratitude.
Thank You's.


Evan, you're a walking, talking, beer drinking example of what can be achieved with focus and discipline. Having you near by has been an incredible reenforcement for my own good habits. Thank you for working harder than I do. Thank you for introducing me to the Alchemist, thank you for living the gift.

Gui, meeting you has been the most worthwhile outcome of my time in Tallahassee. You are a fantastic friend and fantastic business partner. Thank you for being so diversely skilled. Thank you for proving that people can change. Thank you for being ambitious. Thank you for questioning me, and thank you for sticking with me through all the ups and downs.

Thank you for...
  • Showing me my roots.
  • Always staying in touch.
  • Keeping me balanced.
  • Never turning me away.
  • Providing me stability.
  • Putting up with my habits.
  • Letting me know that I'm loved.
Jason
  • Thank you for sticking with it.
  • Thank you for paying the bills.
  • Thank you for believing in us.
Tekel
  • Thank you for lending me a shoulder when I really needed it.
  • Thank you for all that we've been through together.
  • Thank you for reminding me how to stay true to my inner compass.
  • Thank you for bringing me to Seattle.
Erin
  • Thank you for staying cool, even during stressful times.
  • Thank you for adopting me as family.
  • Thank you for your endless reserves of empathy.
  • Thank you for doing the work that matters.
Judd
  • Thank you for the great music.
  • Thank you for your company.
  • Thank you for opening up to me.
  • Thank you for defending your positions. I do learn from it, even when I don't agree.
Emanuel
  • Thank you for being smarter than I am.
  • Thank you for not being deterred by my negligence.
  • Thank you for rescuing me from all my coding nightmares.
  • Thank you for aiming big and keeping me inspired.
Torch
  • Thank you for all our weird rants.
  • Thank you for being willing to learn.
  • Thank you for motivating me to stay in shape.
  • Thank you for putting up with Bolo Ram every single day.
If 2013 is when I started my MBA then 2014 is when I dropped out, lived in denial for a while, then came to my senses and enrolled again from the beginning. At the end of 2013 I really thought I had it together; this year proved me wrong. None of what I thought would happen actually occurred. I'm still broke and all my companies are still struggling. However, I have not lost perspective. I know I'm close to solving this. There is no 'if' involved, but the 'when' is certainly proving hard to forecast.
Stalled, then unstalled, then stalled again. LESS started the year essentially dead in the water due to internal tension. Once we emerged, we got some good traction. Our app was finished. The city is ready for the contract. We were featured at StartupGrind. We had a successful presentation to the Citizens Advisory Committee and City Commission groups. Even with all that we've hit the wall again. We have a plan of where we're going, but we need more people, and Gui and I need to launch BTP before LESS can get our full attention again.
THE FUTURE The potential of LESS is too strong for us to give up on it. The plan is to continue forward with this as the full time job.
LESS mobile app
LESS mobile app
NoteBooster is still the only profitable web startup I've ever been a part of. But as planned, we allowed it to commit Seppuku this year. NoteBooster had to die in order for my focus to go to my other projects where stakeholders are counting on me to produce. THE FUTURE Thankfully digital deaths are not as permanent as the other kind. In the right hands NoteBooster still might be able to thrive. There is a possibility of it coming back in a different form with a larger team behind it.
Users 2,508 2014: 269 2013: 1,164 2012: 1,075
Downloads 2,925 2014: 321 2013: 1,164 2012: 1,243
Notes Created 217 2014: 41 2013: 81 2012: 97
Paid Notes 84% 2014: 83% 2013: 80% 2012: 89%
Bid that project allows homeowners and contractors to more easily communicate. The idea is simple, but the attempts to implement it have been a nightmare. I avoided the traps of those who started BTP before me, but I've made several mistakes of my own.

The development has been scarred by poor communication, unrealistic judgment of time, and tunnel vision. I attribute these things to the fact that my team and I have never done these things before. I blame myself more than anyone else because if I had been more perceptive I could've caught the issues before they caused damage. I recognize that I can't change whats been done, but I am certainly learning from it.

But it wasn't all bad with BTP this year. I did manage to successfully delegate several responsibilities that a younger me would've tried to take on myself. Thanks to the strength and versatility of Jenetta and Gui, BTP actually has the leadership necessary to scale once we get the product launched.

Income

My time and attention are the most valuable commodities I have. As with the last few years this year I once again made the difficult decision to sacrifice short term income in the pursuit of my long term goals. I generated almost no income, but I've learned to live on a budget as close to zero as possible. 2014 income: $11,898.48 2013 income: $10,015.72 2012 income: $2,200 2011 income: $12,715.89 2010 income: $35,159.55 2009 income: $41,700

Debt

Surprisingly I was able to continue decreasing my debt. This was a combination of loan deferment and steady but tiny payments. 2014 debt: $12,230.02 2013 debt: $12,729.87 2012 debt: $13,352.44 2011 debt: $10,951.19 2010 debt: $10,730.30 2009 debt: $14,882.85

Account Totals

I had to dig deeper into my accounts to keep up with my standard expenses. 2014 total: $3,667.88 2013 accounts: $4,362.45 2012 accounts: $3,865.97 2011 accounts: $2,862.68 2010 accounts: $6,742.79 2009 accounts: $14,423.86

Business Partners

Jason
Family guy. Business man. Volunteer. I appreciate you and your dedication. LESS has had its shaky moments, but ultimately you've come through on all the challenges we've faced.

You have your pick of profitable niches and interesting projects. Thank you for choosing LESS as something worthy of your continued attention and support. We haven't been able to achieve what we expected yet, but I remain convinced that our core team has what it takes to make things work.
Alan
You too have your pick of projects. In fact, it seems you have too many sometimes. I value your willingness to take business risks, even when you could be just fine continuing with what you know.
Jenetta
You're the provolone in my sandwich, the fulcrum in my lever, the duct tape on my shoes. You hold stuff together. You keep Alan stable and you keep BTP relevant. I know no one with better judgment or with more sincerity.
Gui
Succeed or fail, you're my business partner for the long haul. You think you are a developer. That doesn't matter. What you are in reality is a business owner and a forward thinking problem solver.
Sometimes my brain feels like a highway. Thoughts zoom in and out of my head more quickly than I'd prefer. Of my 107 scribbles and journal entries this year, these are my favorites.

Echo

The universe is quiet.
But within the atmosphere of earth, sheltered from the vacuum of space,
the universe is noisy.
Quack. Honk. Screech. Pop. Wham.
Sound waves clutter the air as a byproduct of natural and man-made forces.
At times it makes the ear canal seem like an unfortunate evolutionary misstep.
At the very least, it makes me bitter that evolution wasn't kind enough to provide an off switch.

But when I need to get work done, I've learned how to shut out the chaos.
I reach for my earmuffs.
When I wear them I am drawn into my own internal universe.
I hear my heart beating. I become aware of my body's processes.
While wearing them, everything outside of me seems more distant, less important.
The clamor calms, reducing itself to a faint echo. It makes me feel centered; in control.
Evolution was too stingy to give it to me, but I am Prometheus.
I have reached for and taken hold of that which was withheld from me.
My earmuffs are my most powerful accessory. They are the amplification of selfness.
It is the quiet fire. It is the gift of introspection.
I've realized why I hate roaches. It's because I'm xenophobic. I may be scientifically minded, and I may be a peaceful understanding person, but roaches are the most alien creatures I am likely to encounter and my reaction to them is one of irrational fear, distrust and phobia. Everything about them upsets me. My fear is manifested through violence. When I see one, I want to kill it. I want to get it out of sight as quickly as possible.

They represent an anti-human existence. I know they can't hurt me, but their presence is an existential threat. They are the products of an evolutionary path so far removed from our own that it's difficult for me to conceive our shared ancestor. My own reactions frighten me. For now I hope the true aliens in the cosmos are smart enough to stay far, far away from us.

Free Will

The following post has been rated
S
Scientific
Not appropriate for casual readers
Or people who don't acknowledge human limitation
Occasionally I encounter people bringing up existential questions about the existence of Free Will and the possible predetermination of events. I think there is a relatively easy answer to that question: The concept of free will does seem to exist, but only within the confines of the three dimensional universe.

My best analogy involves a dot drawn on a piece of paper. Imagine that the dot were alive, and placed in front of a simple two dimensional maze and is given the task of solving that maze. As three dimensional creatures we can look at the paper maze from an angled perspective and easily see the path to the finish line. But in the experience of the two dimensional dot, the maze and all its turns becomes just a seemingly flat, unbroken, straight-line wall. It would be incapable of perceiving the property that we know as depth. If it were brave enough, the dot could eventually stumble its way through the maze due to random probability, but the entire time it would be moving blindly, never knowing if it were making progress or how far it was from the exit.

That is presumably comparable to the way in which we behave if viewed from beyond our own dimensional limit of three. We are not able to see into fourth dimensional space. As it's currently understood Fourth dimensional space is the property known as Time. We do experience Time, but only in a limited sense. We move forward sequentially, experiencing moments in an automated and linear progression. We can conceptualize Time, we can verify that it exists but like the dot, we can not tilt Time at an angle and gain perspective into where we are going. When a moment passes we cannot go back and experience it again. Memory helps us recall some of it, but that is an imprecise retelling, it is certainly not the same as being able to view or truly re-experience the past. A hypothetical observer able to exist in four or more dimensions may be able to do that, and in doing so they might say that for us three dimensional creatures, Free Will does not truly exists since every action we make is clearly visible to them as the result of a series of cause and effect. Where we see unknowns, a fourth dimensional observer may see absolutes. Through the fourth dimension every one of our actions would be visible before, during, and after their actual occurrence, like footsteps set in concrete both behind and in front of us. That would rob us of our concept of "free will, but the critical detail is that it's only true when given access to that higher dimension. For us, stuck in our three dimensional experience, Free Will does exist, so long as the claims can be accepted as true:

  • Living creatures are capable of consciousness
  • Our internal sense of probabilities is not a truly accurate predictive tool
  • We are not influenced by the future in any way that effects our decision making.

    • If the above statements are true then free will exists for the simple reason of ignorance. Tracks exist in the concrete, but we are oblivious to them. Instead we study the choices in front of us and we use deduction or luck to pick the course we want to follow, hoping it will result in an action similar to what we imagine.

    Depth

    My most powerful trait is that I always push myself to remain knowledgeable in the areas of my interest. Most of my time is spent reading, writing, or thinking about the things that fall within the scope of what I consider to be my industry. Often my web browser and downloads folder look unwieldy. They are. Those places are the digital waiting room for content yet to be processed. The inspection and consumption of this data is key to my competitiveness.

    Sometimes I read files and close them without action. Sometimes I write about them. Sometimes I file them away for reference. Most times I think deeply about them. But always I use them to expand my perspective. I consider it analogous to the daily exercise routines of a professional athlete. A sprinter may do bench presses, push-ups and a range of other upper body exercises that on cursory glance do not directly benefit a lower body activity. The reason an athlete may do it is because they know there exists a slight possibility that it may help him or her become 1/100th of a second faster. In a professional race that can be the difference between victory and failure. My scenario is no different. I have used over 3,000 different Mac compatible programs. To be a certified Apple trainer you're only required to know just five. While working for them my depth allowed me to have the answer to questions that no one else could solve. As a web developer I been able to build websites not because I'm good at it, but because of brute force. I study and prepare constantly. I know about hundreds of tools that I'll never use. But I also know a dozen that would be perfect in giving my startup an advantage no matter what direction we may turn.

    My habit of studying and filing data allows me to remain nimble. Even when I do not directly use my portfolio of knowledge, which is the majority of cases, I still gain benefit of having increased depth and perspective. It helps me identify patterns that may not be obvious to another designer, or developer, or entrepreneur. Insight is valuable in a world that changes constantly. I will continue to do my mental bench presses and pushups. I see it as a necessity. It's my unique strength. In the relay race of business, and of life, it's my way of ensuring that when the baton is handed to me I will carry my team across the finish line.

    Timely Events

    David Lynch's Dune, the Macintosh, Terminator, This is Spinal Tap, Gregor Richardson. Each of these things have turned 30 this year. Thirty is an arbitrary number, but in my brain it is the firm threshold between young and not young. I'll never have to deal with the theoretical concept of my dad being a kid. My dad at 15? That just doesn't seem real. It doesn't have to. But now I'm 30. That's a realm I had formerly defined as being parent-territory. I can remember my dad when he was in his 30's. I had teachers in their 30's. Now I'm here, too.

    From this point on I know I'll be carrying a physiological burden. I wont allow myself time to slack off. I wont tolerate obstructive, emotional behavior in the people around me. I'll spend every waking moment working towards my goals. Okay, fine. None of that sounds like any real change. But there will be a difference in intensity. And, like it or not, now a part of my mind will constantly be consumed with the idea of parenthood and marriage. But the heaviest burden of all is that I know I've missed my self imposed deadline. My businesses should have been done by now. Thirty was suppose to be the point where I start the next set of goals in my life, but here I am already and the horizon of my success is still not in sight. That kind of stings. I shall continue on; I don't really have much choice. But it will forever be with the knowledge that I didn't make it on time.

    I've made huge sacrifices to live the life I have. Occasionally I do feel echoes of regret about my decisions. I know that had I gone a traditional route, at this current age I'd have a decent amount of money and assets. However, it's fair to believe that I would not have the same depth or the ambition that this life has gestated in me. At thirty I have plans that may enable me to build multiple successful companies. I have further plans that may change an entire country, and I have the opportunity for a legacy that can inspire countless numbers of people. My inner hunger has been steadily building for most of my life, accelerating notably since the age of 24. As it is now, I focus on learning all day and it's still not enough. If I were working for someone else's company, donating my time and splitting my loyalty, the cultivation of the scale and audacity of my thinking would not seem feasible. So ultimately I still see my current path as the best route to true satisfaction and accomplishment. This path of being "self made" has profound psychological benefits. But god dammit, couldn't I have been done with it at 28?
    Even my entertainment is subject to analysis.

    Music

    I really enjoy my music. For me, listening to songs is an active experience, not a passive one. I deconstruct each track. I pay attention to lyrics, pitch, composition, and a dozen other factors that makes every one unique. The relationship I've built with each song is intimate. My music collection is like a neighborhood, and I've visited most residents hundreds of times, playing them repeatedly until their patterns are a part of my subconscious. It has taken me 15 years to build my digital collection of songs, and I have a tremendous love for each one.

    Musician of the Year: Muse

    I don't know what they want, I don't know if they can be stopped, and I don't think I mind at all. Muse sort of blind-sighted me. I've been vaguely aware of their existence for a few years, but I've never had the desire to listen to their work. I finally got around to it this year when Tekel gave them to me as a part of a musical goodie basket. They have a lot of bland tracks, but to their credit, their lyrics are imbued with a degree of emotional intelligence higher than that of the average rock band. And on the rare occasion when they get all the elements just right, their stuff stuff can be remarkable and quite unlike anything else I've encountered before. Their sound is what I'd expect to hear if Pink Floyd mated with the Star Wars universe. They make music that feels like it belongs in an epic Space Opera. I am very happy about that.
    Songs of the Year
    Bolo RamBolo Ram isn't about entertainment. I turn to it for inspiration and calm. 15 minutes long and six words deep, it is the ruthless monarch of my music library. For the past four years it has dominated my listening habits. I listen to it so much that I have to consciously try and make time to listen to other things. I tried to retire Bolo Ram in March of this year when it hit 2,000 cumulative playcouts. I even purchased new music from Wah! to replace it. That didn't work. The song still went on to reach 3,000 plays by November.
    I wont give up - Jason MrazThis has been the most uplifting song discovery of 2014. Jason Mraz, the laid back causal singer I first encountered in 2001 has grown up in the last decade and a half. He still has his clear, beautiful voice and the guitar is prominent in the tune. The song is about persevering through difficult times. I find it to be deeply spiritual and very moving. It gives a message that nearly everyone would want to hear; there's still hope. The song does have an unnecessary religious undertone, and he incorrectly describes stars as burning*, but I don't expect the guy to be perfect.
    Invincible - MuseThis song exemplifies what I've come to appreciate about Muse. It has their special blend of compelling lyrics, satisfying synths, and the feel of a space age rock anthem.
    *stars don't burn, they undergo thermonuclear fusion.
    Music Stats
    Songs in Library 10,831 11,656 in 2013
    Plays in 2014 14,338 13,393 in 2013
    Total Plays 143,009 125,665 in 2013
    Avg. Track Length 5:00 5:18 in 2013
    Avg. Play Count 11.5 9.6 in 2013
    Library Size 95.8GB
    2014 Overview 2013 Overview
    Top Tracks 2014 Top Tracks All Time Top Artists 2014 Top Artists All Time
    • Stat Facts
    • 52% of my top bands have female lead vocals, 23% have males, and 25% have none.
    • Most top decades: 2000s, 1990s, 1970s, 2010s, 1980s.
    • Play percentage for those decades: 40%, 25%, 5%, 3%, 2%.
    • I listen to the most music at 9PM.
    • My library contains 2068 artists. The top 10 receive 28% of the total play counts.
    Love Affairs
    1. Wah!
    3782 plays
    +1625
    35:08:33:35
    2. Dan Simmons
    763 plays
    +763
    02:02:41:10
    3. Veruca Salt
    4121 plays
    +649
    11:03:14:00
    4. Frank Herbert
    4012 plays
    +368
    23:22:34:01
    5. ABBA
    8672 plays
    +293
    24:16:51:28
    6. Enya
    4524 plays
    +269
    10:23:34:11
    7. Jason Mraz
    972 plays
    +267
    02:14:13:52
    8. Muse
    226 plays
    +212
    00:16:57:12
    9. Bill Bryson
    535 plays
    +169
    01:05:59:54
    10. Lizz Wright
    441 plays
    +157
    01:12:23:45
    11. Sixpence None the Richer
    2927 plays
    +252
    08:12:42:45
    12. Nneka
    1082 plays
    +159
    03:00:51:43
    13. Regina Spektor
    1891 plays
    +150
    05:00:40:55
    14. Kate Earl
    440 plays
    +133
    03:03:31:33
    15. Garbage
    1295 plays
    +149
    03:13:48:36
    16. Royal Philharmonic Orchestra
    305 plays
    +124
    00:23:28:03
    17. Immediate
    457 plays
    +123
    01:05:48:45
    18. Taylor Swift
    273 plays
    +122
    00:17:06:36
    19. Bond
    493 plays
    +121
    01:10:22:31
    20. Daryl Banner
    171 plays
    +113
    00:11:39:15
    21. Girl Talk
    1176 plays
    +109
    03:14:24:19

    Books

    Hyperion - I listened to it on recommendation from Andrew. I thought I'd be getting a Dune-caliber epic. I was wrong. Perhaps it's my fault for setting the bar impossibly high. But even without comparison to Dune Hyperion is still poorly written and unevenly paced. It's an insult to the John Keats poems from where it draws it's inspiration. And even with its obvious failures, I still liked it. The book had some very compelling aspects. I credit Dan Simmons with being a good researcher and a creative visionary. He's just not a good story teller.

    His portrayal of a possible future human society is believable and nuanced. It offered great perspective into some of our present habits and it lead me to intellectual discoveries I hadn't thought of before. His ideas on Artificial Intelligence are similarly compelling. His story takes a very long time to set up. The most important reveals seem to come in the final book. There is placed four paragraphs whose gravity is so significant that it seems to be his entire purpose for writing the series. It's there that he presents his beautiful vision of what humanity can someday become. But even in presenting this grand concept the author seems shy, like someone not confident in his message or in its delivery.

    Through out the series there are other notable moments of setups and payoffs. For a patient reader, those moments are interesting rewards. For most, it wont justify the tedium. The series spans four books. Each is filled with such repetition and other fluff that the entire series could have been written as a 100 page short story. Hyperion is The three or four concepts I gained from it make it useful, but it us still very bad literature.

    The Alchemist - Fantasy is a great mechanism for introducing people to new ideas. It gets past our usual resistance against things that are new and different. It can be used as a Trojan horse, implementing metaphor to teach us things that apply to our real life. That is what I see in the Alchemist. Behind its veil of fantasy and mysticism it provides a step by step account of the road to entrepreneurial success. A book like that doesn't appeal to everybody. But for me it's a reminder of why I should continue. It's a comforting reassurance that the path I am on mirrors that of many other people who have aimed for big things, no matter what their starting point.
    Creativity Inc - Written by Pixar's President Ed Catmull, this book tells the story of Pixar's creation and the valuable lessons learned along the way. Part management theory and part memoir, its told in a plain and personable style that give a seemingly candid look into the inner workings of their company's legendary culture. Ed narrates through the successes and many failures Pixar encountered and provides explanations not just on what they happened but also on what the company did to better prevent that type of mistake in the future. I haven't had any major business success yet. Until I do, the personal accounts in this book may be the closest I'll get to understanding the experience.
    All Tomorrows - This is a fictional work on speculative biology. It tells a story of the descendants of Homo Sapiens Sapiens; our descendants. The story had a profound impact on how I define the phrase "Long Term" and it makes me reconsider what it means to be human.

    The full title is "All Tomorrows: A Billion Year Chronicle of the Myriad Species and Varying Fortunes of Man." It spans a dizzying amount of time, starting with humanity's first steps in space colonization and then moving forward to key points in our fictional future. Humanity is seen undergoing endless changes as the tremendous distances of space and the demands of new environments causes divergent evolution, mutation and genetic drift. Each stop in the story's progression traverses hundreds, thousands, or millions of years. By the first several jumps the reader is left viewing a species so remote from what we currently know that for all intensive purposes, our own species becomes alien--yet they all consider themselves to be human. It forces the reader to confront the reality that the concept of a species is a fluid thing. Whatever we define ourselves as, whatever the object of our pride, all discrete characteristics are fleeting. In the long term it is all subject to change. Human beings will not always have two arms, two legs, a heart and a brain. The story added a new depth to my understanding of reality. That does not happen often. It helps me touch an imagined future. It excites my mind in a way that the absurdity of daily life cannot. All Tomorrows is a true masterpiece of science fiction.

    Movies

    Interstellar


    Interstellar is a very bold film. It's a gem among Hollywood blockbusters. It's a big budget movie that tackles deep ideas and, even more remarkably, treads new ground. It explores the tension between family and species, it's bold enough to address the purpose of human life, the abandoning of ignorance, and the deadly effects of stagnation. It also manages to deliver those heavy notions while wrapped in some of the most polished space-scapes ever seen on screen. It's a compelling combination. For some this film may create a longing for something they didn't know they wanted. It's a calling card for all humanity to stop looking down and start looking up again. We are urged to embrace the future, whatever it may hold.

      Key Morals:
    • Emotions are the best and worse of our qualities.
    • We can solve our own problems.
    • Don't live in the shadow of yesterday. Embrace the unknown.
    • Love isn't always the answer, but it's a hell of a motivator.
    • Whatever can happen, will happen.

    Life After Beth


    By no means is this a great movie. The only reason it mattered to me is because I have a crush on Aubrey Plaza. The movie is about unhealthy relationships and the way they can stretch on longer than they probably should. It's message is about recognizing when to call an end to a relationship, and also the importance of closure. The movie captures the strange emotions of watching someone close to you slowly change into a person you no longer recognize. Also... zombies.

    Comics

    Naruto

    Naruto is an adventure series about big goals, hard work, loss, and love. Now, after 15 years, it has finally come to an end. In the beginning I fell in love with the strategy and choreography of the fighting, but as time went on I realized the emotional depth it offered. It has a very realistic way of portraying emotions. I've laughed and cried along with it, knowing exactly the feelings their characters go through. What's more, I know that Jon also liked this series. He read it for the first few years and as far as I can tell it was one of his favorites as well. The creators of Naruto understood what it was to work hard. That came across clearly in their writing. There have been many times when I have found kinship through Nartuo characters that I could not find in the people around me. The characters seemed to understand the struggles I was going through, and that made me feel less lonely.

    It was a very special series for me, but I am still glad to see it come to an end. It peaked creatively years ago. I wont miss it now that it's over, but I will never forget it either.

    Games

    The Last of Us


    The Last of Us was a video game, but it was cinematic enough to be a movie. It's creators NaughtyDog are known for that. It's also a riveting drama filled with strong characters and an emotional story arch. The game's story is about survival in a post apocalyptic world of monsters. But from the beginning of the game it was clear that the real monsters were the human beings, not the infected zombies who roamed the streets.
    Within the first minutes of the game's chaotic start the posturing of civilization was shed and animistic behavior took over. Neighbors shot each other, people refused to help those suffering. Soldiers killed civilians. In the game you're forced to kill almost as many humans as zombies. The worse part of it is I know the type of behavior shown in the game is realistic. Our veil of civilization is thin. And distrust, fear, irrationality is rampant. Religious and political differences can already throw people into bloodlust. xenophobia and clan mentality is already a problem. When there is no authority to monitor those behaviors, and when the stakes are raised to life and death? The game might've underestimated the true likely outcome.

    Diablo 3: Reaper of Souls


    Diablo 3 is a repetitive, mind numbing waste of time, yet I spend more time playing it than any other game in the past 15 years. Even though I dislike the game, it has two redeeming qualities that keep me coming back: continuity of the characters, and the large social community. Diablo is a never ending game, and it's characters do not get deleted. I have been playing the same Wizard character for two years. That continuity creates an artificial sense of accomplishment that I appreciate. That is in contrast to a game like StarCraft which, while it provides excellent strategy, starts with a clean slate every time. Diablo allows me to feel rewarded for the time I spend in the game. The social aspect of Diablo is useful when I play online with my friends who are now scattered across the country.

    Don't Starve


    Don't Starve is a prettier and more rigid version of Minecraft. The game is difficult. There are no instructions, no real tips, and no way to actually win. The goal is to survive for as long as you can, and the path for doing so is very open ended. It's the style and polish of the game that really makes it work for me. Some day I wouldn't mind creating something similar to this.
    Science is a new section in my reviews. I choose to include it because I find that my priorities have become much clearer with age. The scientific process is our species most useful invention. On this page I wish to celebrate human knowledge, discovery and progress.

    Breakthrough of the Year

    Discovery of Gravitational Waves

    Gravitational waves are a concept in physics. It describes ripples in the curvature of space time that result from an objects mass. Its existence is predicted by Einstein's theory of general relativity, but no method has successfully been able to successfully detect it. The huge usefulness of gravitational waves is that it allows the analysis of phenomenon too far away to be observed through other methods. This provides an avenue of study on distant black holes and stars. Gravitational waves also provide strong evidence for the early inflation behavior of the big bang. The phenomenon was recorded at the BICEP2 telescope in March. If the results survive peer review and the phenomenon can be captured in other experiments then we may soon dramatically increase our knowledge of deep space events.

    Breakthrough of the Year (Runner Up)

    Photoswitches for solar energy storage

    A team of researchers at MIT and Harvard University have developed a solar cell that acts as its own battery. The material in these Photoswitches is known as azobenzene and it's capable of absorbing the sun's heat and then storing the energy in a chemical form which can be released on demand. The solar energy is stored in the molecules of the material and, in theory, the energy can be stored forever. The energy is extracted when exposed to small amounts of light, heat or electricity. The potential uses for this are numerous. Look for developments in the next two years.

    Scientifically Literate Poetry

    Scientifically literate poetry combines verifiable factual situations and presents them in a way that resonates with human emotions and perspective. I did not write any scientifically literate poetry this year, but it's my ambition to do so in the future. I have found inspiration in the works of several others, and I'd like to acknowledge my favorites among them.

    Pale Blue Dot

    By Carl Segan - Pale Blue Dot, 1994

    This poem is a passage from Carl Segan's 1994 book of the same title. It was written in response to a photo taken of the Earth by the Voyager 1 space craft as it left the solar system. The photo, taken 4 billion miles away, is the furthest distance from which the Earth has ever been viewed.
    From this distant vantage point, the Earth might not seem of any particular interest. But for us, it's different. Consider again that dot. That's here. That's home. That's us. On it everyone you love, everyone you know, everyone you ever heard of, every human being who ever was, lived out their lives. The aggregate of our joy and suffering, thousands of confident religions, ideologies, and economic doctrines, every hunter and forager, every hero and coward, every creator and destroyer of civilization, every king and peasant, every young couple in love, every mother and father, hopeful child, inventor and explorer, every teacher of morals, every corrupt politician, every "superstar," every "supreme leader," every saint and sinner in the history of our species lived there – on a mote of dust suspended in a sunbeam.

    The Earth is a very small stage in a vast cosmic arena. Think of the rivers of blood spilled by all those generals and emperors so that in glory and triumph they could become the momentary masters of a fraction of a dot. Think of the endless cruelties visited by the inhabitants of one corner of this pixel on the scarcely distinguishable inhabitants of some other corner. How frequent their misunderstandings, how eager they are to kill one another, how fervent their hatreds. Our posturings, our imagined self-importance, the delusion that we have some privileged position in the universe, are challenged by this point of pale light. Our planet is a lonely speck in the great enveloping cosmic dark. In our obscurity – in all this vastness – there is no hint that help will come from elsewhere to save us from ourselves.

    The Earth is the only world known, so far, to harbor life. There is nowhere else, at least in the near future, to which our species could migrate. Visit, yes. Settle, not yet. Like it or not, for the moment, the Earth is where we make our stand. It has been said that astronomy is a humbling and character-building experience. There is perhaps no better demonstration of the folly of human conceits than this distant image of our tiny world. To me, it underscores our responsibility to deal more kindly with one another and to preserve and cherish the pale blue dot, the only home we've ever known.

    The Hopeful Photon

    By RamsesThePigeon - Reddit, 2014.

    This is from a Reddit post. Reddit is an unconventional social platform where a viewer is equally likely to encounter witty jokes, photos of kittens, or groundbreaking solutions to the biggest problems in mathematics and physics. Reddit is a microcosm of the Internet itself. It is simultaneously fascinating and offensive. Its many, many insights are counterbalanced with some very bizarre content and a strong abundance of sexual innuendo. But even in its extremes Reddit remains one of the finest showcases for human creativity.
    The sun opened her caring eyes
    Ready to light up morning skies
    She gazed down lovingly at Earth
    Preparing to spread warmth and mirth
    "I need a photon," said the sun
    "To make it known the day's begun"
    Then with a voice so full of glee
    The Hopeful Photon said "Pick me!"
    "I am a particle of light!"
    "I know that I can do it right!"
    "I'll head to the Earth right away!"
    "I'll help to brighten up their day!"
    The sun blinked and then she smiled
    So proud of her hopeful child
    She nodded once and off it flew
    The photon, heading for the blue
    It journeyed through the cold and dark
    Never losing its bright spark
    Eight minutes there in outer space
    Before it came to see your face
    The Hopeful Photon said "Hello!"
    "My friends, the grass, are there, you know!"
    But you stayed silent, didn't care
    And the photon's life just ended there
    It was absorbed without a sound
    A shadow was cast on the ground
    And this is where the story ends
    You kept the photon from its friends
    Jerk.

    Favorite Video

    Overview - Planetary Collective

    Overview is a short film that explores the immense sense of awe experienced by some astronauts as they are struck by the sight of planet earth from a distance. It seems that from a distance the size of it, the fragility, and the beauty are there to be seen in a way that is not evident in our terrestrial experience. The film was made to commemorate the 40th anniversary of the famous Blue Marbel photograph.

    My Most Profound Thought of the Year

    A lot of thoughts float through my head in a given year. Some of my observations are common, others are not. Below is my most significant.

    Transitional Intelligence


    If intelligence is defined as the capacity for logic, abstract thought, understanding, self-awareness, communication, learning, emotional knowledge, memory, planning, creativity and problem solving then human beings are not fully intelligent. Our species demonstrates those traits only intermittently. Emotions, bias, poor recollection, lack of attention, poor comprehension and other issues can prevent us from thinking intelligently, even when we consciously wish to do so. In the time when those traits are achieved a significant degree of concentration is often required even for relatively simple expressions of the above mentioned traits, suggesting that we may not have complete mastery of the traits. Also, the capacity for intelligence varies dramatically between individuals, suggesting there has yet to be a stabilization of the trait within the species. And, comparing the human capacity to learn to the volume and variety of potentially knowable information in the universe, human beings may have the potential to develop into intelligent animals, but by our own definition of the concept we are not there yet.

    tl;dr: Our species might not yet meet the threshold for intelligence, but it seems we're on our way there.

    Profound Thought of the Year (Runner Up)

    All life on earth shares the same basic structure of carbon based DNA, RNA and proteins. All life on earth can be traced back to common ancestors approximately 3.5 billion years ago. That's a simple concept, but it has profound implications. It means that given enough time, all life on this planet is effectively interchangeable. Human beings are made from the same stuff as grass, and as sharks, and bananas. Given enough time the grass can turn into a bipedal organism with hands, feet, eyes, a nose and a mouth, and humans can turn into frogs, or bats, or oak trees. In a broad sense we are all the same type of organism, we are all a part of the same homogeneous strain of life. Every microorganism on the planet has compatible DNA. DNA life is our organism type. That may be unique to our planet. A true calling card for identifying earthlings, be it fauna, flora, or fungus. The idea of species may always remain useful for our own subclassifications and subjugations, but from a galactic standpoint our organism type seems much more relevant than our specific species.

    Best Interactive Tools

    The Scale of the Universe

    Scale of the Universe is a beautiful tool for gauging the relative size of common objects in the observable universe.

    International Space Station

    The International Space Station provides a 24/7 live feed from aboard the space craft. From time to time I listen in just so I can remind myself that there are human beings in space right now, preparing the way for humanity's next frontier.
    http://www.ustream.tv/channel/live-iss-stream
    It has been said that computers are like bicycles for the mind. They are tools that, when utilized properly, can greatly improve the efficiency of our natural abilities. That is the realm where I live. These are the tools that help me accomplish my goals.

    My Tech

    Industry Analysis

    Apple

    Apple is the artist who works on one piece of art at a time. They craft their work in secret, obsessively tooling every detail. Once finished they showcase their work to the world and it's widely admired. But internally they're never satisfied, and from the moment the current work is unveiled they mentally discard it, casting it away as if it were an automatic failure. For them the current product will never be good enough. The focus is always on what will come next--At least all of that is the description I would've given to Apple in the era of Jobs. Steve's death has thrown Apple into an early middle age. The internal structure of Apple is superbly optimized, but it relies on clear intuition and instructions from the top. Tim Cook is not the man for that job. He is, by all accounts, an extraordinary logistics manager. What he has never been is a creative visionary. He is restructuring Apple to compensate for this new reality. Jonathan Ives is now in charge of hardware and software design. Angela Ahrendts has been hired to take over retail operations, and Craig Federighi has been brought back to the company to lead the Software Engineering group. These are promising changes, but each of these individuals faces a formidable adaptation curve.

    Meanwhile, Apple's sales are becoming increasingly homogeneous. iOS hardware makes up 68% of the company's revenue. Within that is a dangerous reliance on one product; the iPhone. YoY iPad sales have been shrinking for the past three consecutive quarters. iPod sales are lower than they have been in the past decade. Starting next quarter iPod sales will no longer be reported as a separate line item. Mac sales are up, but it has virtually no potential for explosive growth. I imagine that the artist is itching to start a new painting, but with their chief creative force gone I don't think they remember how. Apple Pay will bring them a strong new revenue source. But for a product-company like Apple, that wont be their flagship creation. I anticipate that Apple's next innovation will not come from within, but instead will be a mega merger. I can't read them well enough to anticipate what it'll be, but knowing the strengths of the key players at the top it seems a probable direction.

    Best New Product: iOS 8

    iOS has succeeded in doing what the Mac has not. It is intuitive and exciting. Users understand its potential and are comfortable enough with it to voraciously consume 3rd party apps. It is not only exciting for its users. It excites Apple, too. That can be seen in the innovations they continue to build on their mobile platform. iOS 8 was a feature rich update. It caught up to many features from competing platforms while adding several platform-unique tools. What's most noteworthy is that it was built no real compromises. It bucks recent industry trend by giving while taking away virtually nothing.

    Worse New Product: Mac OS Yosemite

    Apple's hardware and software outside of iOS have gone years without any significant feature additions. Despite years of annual OS updates, the feature-set of Mac OS is fairly unchanged. Mac OS Yosemite does add features. It increases integration with iOS and it improves the usefulness of Apple's cloud services. But the marquee change in this update is the User Interface. The OS has been retooled to better match the ascetics of iOS. I am not a fan. I do not object to the concept of change. The ideas put forward are not terrible, but it certainly is not polished.

    Worse yet, even with the revamped UI Mac OS contains hundreds of missing or incomplete features that have been ignored for years. The situation leaves me furious. Apple uses very small internal development teams to produce very widely used software. It seems that these teams have not scaled even as the user base has. A single developer can not give full attention to six complex apps within the one year product cycle that Apple enforces, no matter how good they are. System Preferences has misaligned icons. Alert boxes cause visual glitches on relatively recent hardware. Quality control is slipping. And I know that in a parallel life I would have been the employee responsible for getting those things done.

    Special Review: Mac Pro

    In the year that the Mac Pro has been available I have yet to encounter a review that adequately sums it up. So below is the Mac Pro article that someone should have written:
    The most inconveniently situated device Apple has made in decades, the Mac Pro is simultaneously a huge achievement, a great product, and an absolutely terrible computer.

    With a stratospheric starting price of $3,000, one of the Mac Pro's primary roles is to show how good of a deal the iMac really is. It a very clear identifier for customers. If you want value, go there. This is for those who desire the absolute best with no expenses spared. It's through this approach that the Mac Pro produces absolutely no cannibalization in Apple's existing product lines.

    One of the things that it does do is garner significant media attention for Apple, even if no one buys it. It's beautiful, it's tiny, it's daring. The Mac Pro is arguably the most daring reimagining of the desktop computer to happen since the conception of the current form factor about 20 years ago. It's not just ascetics. It's a new take on what computers should be equipped with and how they should be upgraded. The minimum standard configuration comes with two graphics cards, flash storage, and a multi-core workstation architecture. This creates an easy target for software developers in the coming years who know for certain that they can expect that level of power in the systems used by their intended customers.

    With most computers, upgradability almost exclusively refers to internal capacity. The Mac Pro can be upgraded internally. It's graphics cards, processor, RAM, and storage can be removed and exchanged, if appropriate parts eventually become available. But its real expansion comes in a different form. The Mac Pro encourages upgrades to happen through external modules. This is a machine built around the flexibility of Thunderbolt 2.0. Thunderbolt is almost protocol agnostic. One Thunderbolt port can support any device designed for USB, Firewire, DisplayPort, HDMI, VGA, Ethernet, or PCI-E. With six of these ports available, the Mac Pro provides a powerful flexibility that's never really existed before. On one port a full speed graphics cards can be plugged in externally and possibly even daisy chained with a scanner and network card. It's an almost alien concept in a computing world traditionally founded on discrete specialization.

    The Mac Pro is a showcase new technologies and thinking that are not ready for mainstream. This is not the machine that the pro market was asking for. Now that it's here, they don't know how to deal with it. It doesn't fit in a 1U rack. It's not designed to go under a desk. It doesn't work with their existing internal components. Software isn't written to take advantage of the standard dual workstation classed graphics cards, or the six to 12 Xeon processor cores. Who benefits from buying this machine right now? Almost no one. For the moment it disrupts hardware and software expectations.

    This future-thinking Mac Pro represents today what the MacBook Air was in the past. It is Apple’s equivalent of a concept car. It's a showcase of new ideas and of things to come. It startles the computing world, preparing them for a direction that Apple sees as beneficial. Inevitable. It captures the imagination of customers and becomes the envy of other manufacturers. You see, the remarkable element here is that Apple is so well situated that even its unfinished concepts sell as real products and go for top dollar.

    Google

    This is a company that I understand. They are the Yang to Apple's Ying. Google approaches problems the way I would, through brute force logic. They attempt difficult challenges even without knowing if a solution is possible. I understand their roadmap, I value their products, and I support the vast majority of their decisions. I even sympathize with their perceived lack of focus. Google is the first major enterprise to be born on the web and whose business model has proven capable of thriving in the constantly fluctuating hyper-competitive landscape that is the Internet. At their core, Google's specialty is information management. That has always been the case. That core focus is the connecting link between all the various projects they undertake. Global information management is not a skill easily acquired. It's why their competitors have such a difficult time catching up to them. The company I know of that can compete on those grounds is their spiritual grandfather, IBM.

    Best Product: Material Design

    Apple revolutionized computing in the 1980's. A major component of that was their decision to take usability seriously. In the 80's Apple created the Human Interface Guidelines. That, for the first time, created a rulebook for software designers explaining what they should and should not do. Those ground rules made standardization of user interfaces possible, which in turn dramatically increased the viability of their platform. Google's Material Design is their attempt at the same thing. It is very rough around the edges, and the tools do not yet exist to create the experiences Material Design describes, but the concept is sound. In time this could be a unifying tool for not just Android devices but also for general web design.

    Worse Product: Google Plus

    It's not working. Google Plus is as good as Facebook, but parity is not enough to beat an entrenched competitor. Plus feels abandoned and uncool. But the worse offense is that Google continues to push it onto people who have no interest in the product. For a company whose main products are world changing innovations and must-have tools, Google Plus is at best something begrudgingly tolerated, and at worse it's entirely ignored.

    Highlight: Google Maps

    The accuracy and volume of data behind this stack of web services is frightening. Google has so completely mastered that niche that as a consumer I cannot look at their product and imagine it working any better than it currently does. And they have so completely disrupted the market that I cannot remember how things worked before they existed.

    Tesla

    Elon Musk has done the improbable. He has gotten me to pay attention to a car company. While I don't care about automobiles, I do care about innovation. I admire Tesla for their tenacity. They are poster child for young disruptive companies. They've willingly entered an entrenched market with the intent of changing an industry while also doing a public good, and making a healthy profit in the process.

    Their long term strategic goal is to create a mass market for electric vehicles. They pursue their goal from multiple angles: They sell their vehicles, they create components for other manufacturers, and they serve as first mover and catalyst for the industry.

    One of the most impressive aspects of their company is their vertical model. They employ a team of world class engineers, they have fully independent manufacturing for their vehicle production, they'll soon control a majority share of world's lithium battery production, their direct sales model cuts out 3rd party dealers, and they own 200 patents to support the entire process. And consumer purchases are spurred by government subsidies for electric vehicle purchases. There is a lot I can learn fem studying this company's success.

    Best Product: Model S P85D

    This is Tesla's new flagship car. By my account it is also the first non-compromised product they've produced. Prior to this their cars have been a mix of cutting edge technology with several under developed facets, due to the company's young age and slightly limited resources. The P85D adds many missing features including four wheel drive, road sensors and adaptive cruise control and upgraded interiors. It does that while still retaining it's title as the fastest four door sedan in the world.

    Worse Product: Model X

    It's not out yet, so final opinions will be reserved until later, but a minivan isn't exactly the killer mass model vehicle I was hoping for from Tesla.

    Highlight:

    Tesla vehicles will soon offer autonomous driving capabilities. It's not a Google self driving car, but it will drop you off and go park itself.

    Jason

    The cheapest way isn't necessarily the best.
    Know the limits of your bandwidth.
    A sandwich tastes better when someone else makes it.
    Stick to your own business model when beginning in a new business; avoid innovating yourself to death.

    Gui

    Just because you can't articulate a point doesn't mean it isn't valid.
    You don't always need to pick favorites.
    Success is most often a result of focus.
    Communicate your expectations of what you expect from others.
    Stay away from magnets and Netflix documentaries.

    Evan

    Sometimes all you have to do is ask.
    People don't buy into what you're doing, they buy into why you're doing it.
    You can push yourself beyond almost any limit if you take the task seriously.

    Torch

    You can never have too many plastic bags.
    Hot water is no big deal until you no longer have any.
    You can always put off grocery shopping for one more day.
    Always name your sword.

    Rose

    You cannot determine how far a person has come just by looking at where are today.
    Proximity and open mindedness can reveal unlikely compatibilities between people.
    Self honesty is the first step in changing one's own behavior.
    Empathy can bridge the gap between people of wildly different backgrounds.

    Cynthia

    Sometimes no just means "I don't know."
    The frameworks established during first impressions can be hard to shake.
    What people ask for is not always what they want.
    It's important to receive acceptance from those we care about.
    Confidence matters.
    People sometimes need assurance of acceptance before feeling comfortable enough to truly express themselves.
    It's hard to train someone to be who you want them to be.
    Sometimes a person waits for an outside influence to become an excuse to do or say what he or she wanted all along.

    Life

    Not everyone leaves the cave, but those who do can make amazing discoveries.
    True discipline is measured by how well you do when no one is looking.
    Being brutally honest saves time and energy.
    Acknowledge good work, even if the appreciation is assumed to be obvious.
    Consistency and honesty are rare traits; don't take them for granted.
    You cannot have an opinion on a fact. It's true whether or not you believe in it.
    Memories are created when our sense of normality is disrupted.
    The goals on this page are not my life goals; those are unwavering and clear. These are the bonus achievements. And my track record for accomplishing these has been pretty mixed.

    2014 Goal Recap

    Task:
    Learn Javascript
    Result:
    Failed
    This task has been on my goal list for the past three years. I still have not taken it seriously. I know that I don't think like a traditional programmer, and following generic learning material has repeatedly lead me to frustration. That's where I've stopped, but there's no mystery to the situation. If I weren't so lazy and if I'd stop making excuses for myself I'd simply go out and find a guide geared towards teaching programming to designers. I hide behind the excuse of needing to do other things for my businesses, and I rule out learning Javascript because of the time commitment it would require. While it's true that I do have responsibility for those various business tasks, and the time commitment will be large, it also is not impossible. I've done more remarkable things in the name of necessity.
    Action: Side attack. I will begin learning Javascript by focusing on one particular framework. I'll ensure that I get it done by resolving to have future releases of both LESS and BTP built with it. That way I have to learn it to do my job. Sink or swim.
    Task:
    Dance, just a little
    Result:
    Failed
    I'm still intimidated by this. It's a very different activity from what I'm use to. Because it's so foreign it was easy for me not to make time for it. But considering the genuinely good use I put the rest of my time do, I don't foresee myself getting making time for something this casual and frustrating any time soon.
    Action: Abandon it. It doesn't fit with my lifestyle and I don't enjoy it. Maybe I'll reconsider when I reach my goals and my spirit is lighter.
    Task:
    Eat more
    Result:
    Success
    My problem was that I didn't eat enough. I wanted to stop loosing weight, and to gain a little back. I did. My diet greatly improved this year. I learned to buy in bulk and to keep cheap, healthy food on hand at all times. It's helped keep my health and my weight steady even as my income fluctuated.
    Action: Keep it up.
    Task:
    Slow down, just a little
    Result:
    Success
    Balance is important. I've been in hard-core work mode for years now. I need to make sure my routine is maintainable. I achieve this by going for walks, listening to exciting audiobooks, listening to Bolo Ram, and being around other people.
    Action: Keep it up.
    Task:
    Earn $2,500 / month through startups
    Result:
    Failed
    My monthly income was terrible. I only made $1,000 per month, despite working 80 hours a week when totaling my various projects. I need to do better. That amount was virtually unimproved from last year. I failed this year, but I am not giving up.
    Action: I will do all I can to make this happen next year.

    2015 Goals

    I had a 40% success rate on last year's goals. I need to improve that. I don't want these to be just dreams to be casually dismissed. Going forward I'll require myself to list a simple plan along with each intended goal. This year I don't have any stretch goals. All the items I'm holding my self accountable for are items that help me directly in my areas main interests.
    • 1
      Earn $2,500 / month through startups
      I'm in good health and spirits, but I know that I'm living on the edge. I have gone too long without earning a sustainable income. I'm one misfortune away from ruin. I don't own any property, I don't have any investments, I don't have insurance, and I don't have any job other than my startups. And with none of my startups generating revenue, I'm taking a very serious gamble. $2,500 per month is a reasonable target that will allow me to regain my financial health.
      Plan: My allegiance will be entirely to LESS and BTP in the first six months. If I cannot make either of those succeed then I will have to create a small independent project to make me more financially independent.
    • 2
      Learn Angular.js
      This is an evolution of my JavaScript goal from past years. The Internet does not stay still. I need to keep evolving along side it. Having a baseline proficiency in Angular will allow me to be a better business partner for Gui, and it will potentially benefit all our current and future projects.
      Plan: I will use Lynda.com to get a working knowledge of it, then I will hire an experienced Angular developer to rework a project for me. I will work alongside them, getting real world practice.
    • 3
      Get in better shape
      I'm not out of shape, not by normal standards at least, but over the past few years I have lost significant muscle mass. It has not been due to laziness. The cause is an ongoing constraint on my time and my food budget. My personal fitness standard is the ability to run a mile in under 10 minutes and to do 50 pushups. I will resume my regular exercises with those goals in mind. It will be a part of the counter balance to my work schedule, offering me a break in pace and a potential outlet for stress. Also, for now it's the only health plan I've got.
      Plan: Consistency is the key. I will commit to a twice a day upper body exercise routine, interspersed with biweekly runs.
    • 4
      Launch or terminate all startups
      I will launch the startups in my current arsenal. If they do not take off, I will kill them. Not every project is destined to succeed. My startups have been in incubation for so long that the competitive landscapes they were built to compete in no longer exist. I can no longer justify working on them if I prove incapable of bringing them to market.
      Plan: Launch BTP by February 14, 2015. Get traction on LESS in the same time period. Afterwards, give thought to NoteBooster's potential future.

    Big Moments

    We are like butterflies who flutter for a day and think it is forever.
    • Seeing the LESS app published on the iOS app store
    • Being front row at the Veruca Salt reunion concert
    • Coming to terms with the fact that even my idols get old
    • Playing 10 hours of StarCraft with Gui on my birthday
    • Seeing the Naruto series come to an end after 15 years
    • Helping Kreston through a tough time
    • Hearing the Mayor praise LESS
    • Learning the secrets of Publix bogo deals
    • Having my perspective blown open by All Tomorrows
    • Discovering Youtube's strong community of science content

    Small Moments

    Time moves in one direction while our memories move in another.
    • Wading through water at 3AM from a busted pipe in my living room
    • My first new profile picture on Facebook in 5 years
    • Building HeroSmackdown with Erdell
    • Selling out to Bing for $10 a month
    • Hanging out with Devon and Bebe
    • Working at Gui's place every night until 2AM
    • Dinner with Barry & Jenetta
    • Meeting Judd and getting to know his situation
    • Strolling Lake Ella with Rose
    • Bringing down the MadeInTally wifi. Every. Single. Time.

    Who Knew...

    Thank You
    I said that I would not mourn for you, 2014. I lied. You were not an easy year, but I have no expectation for life to always be easy. You had good moments. You lead me to very good people and friendships. Your struggles were worth it, 2014. So long, and thanks for all the fish.
    Agora
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    X

    About This Review


    External Purpose

    It's about gratitude. I am where I am because of a thousand helpful, generous people. This is me celebrating them and the impact they've had on me. This is my way of sharing my trajectory, giving insight into what it is they've helped me accomplish. Every item in it is dedicated to someone.

    Internal Purpose

    It's about self improvement. The best way to understand a thing is through analysis. I seek to understand myself and the world that I'm in. It's an exercise in discipline. And in honesty. And in creativity. And in articulation.